Is being self-centered good or bad?

Last week I talked about how having varied perspectives matters when looking at current events and how different minds will have different thoughts on certain things that, while they might be objectively bad or good, some people will think the opposite anyway. I'd like to add on to that notion because of what we read in class this week, the speech "This is Water" by David Foster Wallace. This speech is about how being aware of what is going on in your head helps you enjoy life more. In my opinion, I think some of his points make sense and his reasoning is sound. However, I disagree on the point he is trying to prove in his speech. Being open-minded about the situation of others and looking on the bright side is not always the most positive mindset in life.

The main reason I am claiming this is because of how Wallace presents the evidence that supports this claim. He uses multiple hypothetical anecdotes that are just that: hypothetical. In theory, using your mind power to clear negative thoughts from your head will make you more content with life. In practice though, this is highly improbable. "We rarely think about this sort of natural, basic self-centredness because it’s so socially repulsive" (Wallace). Wallace says that self-centered people should try to look past themselves and understand what others are going through too, but I think that is just incorrect if you are trying to make life more bearable. To match Wallace's usage of anecdotes, here is an anecdote of my own.

Say you are grocery shopping for Thanksgiving, and you have about 20 minutes to finish shopping and get back to your house, to cook the food that your family is eagerly waiting for. You are driving in holiday traffic so it takes a while to actally get to the store, but you power through and make it there as fast as you possibly can. You enter the store and immediately rush to the meat aisle to get the turkey your family has been anticipating for weeks. Not buying turkey would be disappointing to say the least. You get there and you see one final turkey and a man standing over it, probably thinking of buying it. If you take the last turkey your family will be undoubtedly thrilled when you return home. But if you consider that the other guy has a family too and has mouths to feed as well, and you end up leaving it, you have wasted time driving to the store, and you will either arrive late because you went to another grocery store or you will show up empty-handed, making the holiday miserable for you and your family.

The more we try to understand others, we take ourselves down a peg to get stepped on by the people we try to understand. Having no self-centeredness at all, which is what Wallace is trying to argue as ideal, really just means that you don't hold any existence at all, or, at the very least, your existence has no meaning. Having self-centeredness means you are able to love yourself and value your own happiness, which in my opinion is much more of a factor to whether you enjoy life or not than not being pissed after one annoying day of life. We can only live long if we take care of ourselves, not others.